I love the smell of freshly cut grass in the morning – especially that cut from my own garden as it has a very distinctive smell.  It makes me feel like I am home again, like a returning hero after a bloody conflict in a distant land.

I am sure this is exactly the same smell that Kevin Keegan and many others in recent history have caught of whiff of. This smell, along with huge financial reward, has persuaded them to go back to the land from whence they came or at least in ‘King Kevs’ case, made their name, in order to become conquering heroes one last time before disappearing into the sunset….or something like that.

Mike Ashley, who looks more like a bloke who should be selling you ’3 pound o’ taters’ on Victoria market than running a football club, managed, against all odds, to persuade Kev that he would indeed ‘love it’ if he returned to Newcastle. I remember that day clearly, sky sports news was flooded with texts and emails from the geordie faithful that Kev would ‘take them back’ to former glories and ‘put them back where they belong’. Now in Newcastle United’s case, I am not sure where that is but that’s a different story.

I have a pet rabbit. he hates it when I cut the grass. Now, imagine that Dennis Wise was a menacing lawnmower being wielded by Mr Ashley and Keegan was the rabbit. All of a sudden that grass on which you dined like a king had been taken away and there was nothing more you could do about it. My rabbit hated it, as did Kev so he left.

Popular Scottish pop act Travis claimed that the grass is always greener on the other side….I am not sure I agree.